I cannot get that Young Chuck Norris song out of my head. This might be even worse than Peanut Butter Jelly Time... but I don't want to speculate too soon. That song caused a lot of irreparable damage. I did some things. I tried to forget and nothing really 'stuck.' There are religious professionals in my town who still won't speak to me, but I won't name names, Father Hates-Peanut-Butter-Jelly-Time and Reverend Mother No-Fun-Whatsoever!
Anyway, speaking of religion, today the funny thing I have found online is this, from McSweeney's:
Things You Can Do If You Love Jesus Other Than Honk.
BY JEN GOODHUE
- - - -
Send him flowers for no reason
Pass him a note in geography
Make him a mix tape
Set him free
Make an altar to him with his trash
Here's a great Deep Thought by Jack Handey following this same theme:
"When my friend Bob said he'd found Jesus, I thought, "Yahoo! We're rich!"
But it turned out to be something else."
Buddy Christ.
It's a good day to love da Lord! The cool kids are doing it, so come on and join us. Join us...or...die.
4 comments:
Today at work, the Kindergarten teacher was asking her class about weather and how we find weather reports on tv and in the paper, and she said "Who tells us what the weather will be like each day?" This little girl raised her hand and yelled out "JESUS!"
She said it with so much enthusiasm I almost felt compelled to leap up and shout "AMEN!"
But I didn't.
ha ha! This post cracked me up and then Brianna's comment was just icing on the cake.
Brianna, I agree with Tinapopo that your story is awesome! That must have been funny as hell. Whoops. I meant to say "heck." I wouldn't want to piss off my friend JC. He and I are, like, BFF. :)
(What's funny is I really DO believe in the Jesus 'legends' and all-- I just don't take anything too seriously. Religion needs more joy and less judging, and THAT is my 2 cents.)
I really want to see these Jesus Action Figures!! Oh please, TELL ME they have all 12 of the disciples-- even that fruit Judas...! Oh man he is my total favorite because he was edgy.
(Wait, I have, like, 1,000 more Bible Favorites! Lot's Wife-- both pre- and post- Pillar of Salt! Sarah, old baby-having lady! Yeah! I could build a Bethlehem Dream House and burn some bushes and I am totally set to play for hours before Mom calls me in for dinner!)
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