But before I get to the Munchichi part of this post, here's today's little stupid thing that happened to me at work:
My favorite apple is the Granny Smith variety. I love the color, I love the crunchiness and lord knows I love the tartness. HOWEVER. I do not like it when I happen to be taking that first bite of a Granny Smith apple, and it makes my face pucker up as my mouth tweaks out in pain from the initial tartness, and my boss happens to come over and hand me a printout right at that second, and she says, "Is there a weird smell in here or something?"
So apparently, my first-bite-of-apple face is similar to my what-is-that-weird-smell face.
I don't know. I wish I could just go through life unseen, allowing my face to be free to do whatever it pleases. I don't want running commentary on my facial expressions.
There are a lot of things I don't want, incidentally. I don't want The Herpes, and I don't want to work at the city dump, and I really don't want to sew anything to my scalp with a dull needle. This is just the first three things that came to mind. My life is one big, rambling list of things I don't want, and things that I see and reach for, and stumble as I miss them. Sigh.
Now, on to the Munchichis! Remember them? They who were said to be oh, so soft and cuddly? Ah, sweet little Munchichi, you are a darling little monkey-man. Come here, let me kiss you and shove your thumb into your own mouth. That's a good little Munchichi.
Munchichi is Spanish for "ravenously hungry child prostitute with simian features." I happen to know this because I used to be Spanish for awhile. No. That's a lie. I was never Spanish. I took Spanish. Yeah. That's what I meant. And I failed it. I gave up Spanish, as well as being Spanish, when I did bad in that class. And I have never looked back, nor have I stopped translating things in my own special way. You have to be creative, you know? Otherwise the spirit dies, like so many pigeons in a turbine.
13 comments:
Did you ever find the Hefty! (Hefty! Hefty!) bags for all that dung?
I think my mother actually has my old Monchichi packed away somewhere.
My favorite kind of apples! I knew I liked you!
Awww, I posted on Monchichi's a while back...I had the girl one and my little sis had the boy... then in a burst of over-generousity I gave mine away to the "Mexico kids" during a yearly church Christmas toy drive.
...have you SEEN how much those things sell for now? it's insane!
Somewhere in Mexico, there is a very rich child...somewhere in TX, a grown woman still kicks herself.
Anytime I see a Monchichi, I think of A.C. Slater.
Smackadoodle-- Yes, and it was a Hefty Hefty Cinch Sack. Monkey dung is no match for the cinch sack, ah-ha!
Fraulein-- The sad thing is I can't remember if I had my own Munchichi, or just played with my sister's. At least you had one, you lucky bastard.
Jen-- I know, Granny Smiths rocken die Hause. That's so funny that the Mexico kids got your Munchichi. We dropped off so much stuff to the Salvation Army over the years... some lucky poor kid is probably still gloating over getting my entire My Little Pony collection and my Dancerella doll. Sons of bitches.
Tinapopo-- Wow, at last! Someone has finally accurately described just what it is AC Slater looked like. I knew it was some sort of ape-creature, but with the dimples and the twinkly little monkey-eyes, I knew he wasn't like King Kong or something. It was a munchichi! Thank you for finally allowing me to rest when it comes to the question of what the hell does Mario Lopez look like. It means a lot to me (no sarcasm)...this was keeping me awake nights. You da bomb, Popo.
So, am I going to hell for all the times I insisted on calling my cousin "A.C." and tried to make him get a perm that year he decided that wearing muscle pants and hi-tops was a good idea?
Well, am I???
OMG! Word verificaton: ORKDEN!!!
I saw a newborn baby earlier this year that looked like a Monchichi. I don't feel bad saying that because it was her mother who brought it up in the first place. Parents can be so cruel.
My word verification was "yahpls" - sounds like an illiterat adolescent!
I never actually owned a monchichi. I think they are cute though, with their 60's-esque haircut. I just saw a picture of one and it reminded me of that 60's show, "Laugh In".
And since everyone is mentioning their word verification, mine is "ohcum" God.. I am so immature sometimes.
Janine - Am dying laughing right now. Ohcum, hee! It's like the beginning of an ode to porn!
Smackadocious, I think you were pretty much required to do that to your cousin. He was asking for it, really.
Oh, don't you think I don't smell the irony for having spelled illiterate "illiterat". I'll get you next time, Armsweat.
Man, I love you guys! Ohcum, yahpls, illiterat...it's all good. My own word verification is boring: mhpesm. This is just a sound someone makes as they are being gagged and they are asking their Mom to give them the Pez they dropped. See? Boring.
But you are all my favoritest commenters and bloggers, you and your hilarious comments. I'd be nowhere without all y'all.
Oh, except you Lengli. I'd probably be in Kansas City, living my dream to be a cook in some greasy spoon if you hadn't jumped in and ruined it all for me. You think I don't know it was you, but I do, cupcake. You had to go and tell 'em all I put animal semen in the burgers, didn't you. Well, it's all in the past now, and we can all be adults here.
Or...can we?
MUHAHAHAHAHA!!
Though I'm glad we can all be adults here. You didn't really want to live in Kansas City anyway, did you? Unless if it's the one in Missouri and not Kansas, because I for one love it when townspeople get all rowdy and decide to represent for a town other than theirs. "Hey Fuckers, we're Kansas City too, and now we'll always be more recognizable coz we're Kansas City 'the one that's not in Kansas!'" If I got kicked out of that Kansas City, I'd be pissed at me too.
(My two word verifications [shuttup, I have the digital dexterity of a two-year old] both suspiciously sounded like "queef". Uhhhh...)
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