From Weird Al Yankovic's classic song, "I Want a New Duck" (to the tune of "I Want A New Drug" by Huey Lewis and his 'News'):

I want a new duck
Not a swan or a goose
Just a drake I can dress real cute
Think I'm gonna name him Bruce

One that won't raid the ice box
One that'll stay in shape
One that's never gonna try to migrate or escape
Or I'll tie him up with duck tape.

... That is my definition of a fine song. Thank you. Quack quack, quack quack quack.