One more post and then I really must transcribe some interviews I did recently with "bus dudes."

The other night, I dreamed that I was doing the play "M*A*S*H" again, and it was the scene where I had to take my boots off and put on the big red high heels. There was a time, for real, when the director wanted me to change out of fatigues and into a dress on-stage, but I nixed that one and ended up being able to put the dress on off-stage and come on just to change my shoes. Well, anyway, in the dream, I somehow or other had to take my pants off and get the dress on while on-stage. Only there was some sort of problem-- another actor missed a whole bunch of lines and moved the scene along faster than it should have. So I am left at a point where I am supposed to get off stage really fast, only my pants are stuck down around my ankles and I can't get them off; everytime I try I lose my balance and almost fall off the stage (which really did happen one night, but luckily it was in the dark between scenes so no one saw me and I didn't have pants around my legs at the time, either).

So, finally, I am forced to grab my pants up with one hand under my dress and hobble offstage like a big idiot who can't pull up her pants, the audience pointing and mumbling the whole time. In the dream--and now--I am mortified because they weren't laughing. At least if they were laughing, they would have appreciated the foolishness of it all and the sight of a girl who can't pull her own pants up due to extreme spazziness. Instead, they are murmuring and conferring and probably saying, "that poor girl...so uncoordinated...how sad..." I would rather be laughed at any day rather than discussed in murmurs.